Stolen Bike Alert

A few weeks ago my mom gave me a cannondale that she picked up and stole the wheels off of. I was gonna offer it to my wife but rent is due and Chris needed a bike to go on a tour with his buddies this weekend. Unfortunately when he locked up his bike at Paragon in Union square he was probably followed by the 5P3C14L1Z3D gang or some other pro thief caught the flare riding through grammercy. Chris thought going in for 5 minutes to grab a last-minute necessity he could get away with a cheap Kryptkeeper chain. Sadly the stalker on a 5P3C14L1Z3D or whatever sized up the chain and knew exactly how to defeat it. Knowing that the rider on the hot cannondale would enter the store and almost surely be gone for enough time to snatch the bike and be off; the fiend was able to have confidence to swiftly swipe his Canyonsnail. Most bike thieves stalk their prey. I am not saying that a person should be paranoid and check out all the other cyclists suspiciously instead of paying attention to traffic. Cars are deadly, buss es and trucks?
What I am saying is if you have a sexy whip and are going to Manhattan below 86th street, you need the $100 Krypto NY lock chain or a Fahgettaboutit U'lock and mini for the rear wheel.
When my bike was stolen as when Jacks bike was stolen, it was seen again. The key is to keep the bike. We need to start a phone tree of people who can get the word out and post the photos on a blog or something so that these bikes can be RECOVERED! Follow the bike to the place where the rider locks it and when they enter their destination you lock it with your heavy chain. Photo the bike and call the gang up who will mobilize the recovery force.
Record your bike serial number in your phone and another place you will not forget.
Photograph your bike with you.
Have a bike shop give you a receipt for your bike with the serial number.
Talk about your bike with your friends so they get to know it (don't bore people to tears though)
Care for your bike so that if it is recovered it is more likely in better condition than being ruined because only you know how to ride it and the thief or moron who bought it from the thief who do not know your bike ruin something on your love, your ride.
Bike theft remains out of control in the city and this is truly the lowest form of thievery. Bikes usually belong to people who cannot really afford to replace their bike and pay rent at the same time. I know these are harsh times and car theft is so pasé these days. But bike chop shops are getting closed down or so goes the gossip around the chain vine. Can anyone tell me what happened to that bike shop on Albany? I am too mad to go back and check if the rumors that they were shut down are true or not.
Keep your eyes peeled and call us if you see the cannondale in the photo. Has a dent in the middle of the drive side seat stay and a full RSX gruppo with a new Alex rim on the back and a nondescript cassette freehub and a suntour front hub laced to a late 80s Black anodized Araya rim with 32 spokes and a kenda front tire that had some vulcanzing fluid on the sidewalls to bolster them for the tour. The rear tire was a Vittoria 700X28. The rack Chris painstakingly custom installed was an AXIOM streamliner.
Safe cycling, together we can take a bite out of bike theft...

Jack's Bike Theft Update

I was riding down Bedford to go to the bank and saw this dude riding a black frame with orange hoops down like 50 yards ahead of me and because I had just posted the description on the blog and it was fresh in my mind. I rode nexto him and started observing the bike. There was the Phil low flange hubs, the trackstar sticker, the pentagram, the steamroller drop-outs the silver risers and black stem. Vittoria sticker on the clip-on fender...
The rider looked awkward on the bike and I said "nice bike", a darker cross between Emanuel Lewis and Gary Coleman smiled agreeing. I continued "it's nice because it is MINE!".
This prick denied it all the way back the wrong way up Bedford to Fulton as I pleaded for the bike. He was about 5 foot 7 and 170 lbs. Anyway he led me to this dump of a bike shop on Albany just south of Fulton. I offered him $$ and said we could just walk away. Then he said "I bought this bike from this shop on Marcus Garvey and Fulton. They have my bike and I want it back". Then I got there and the Grey dread lock dude with blotchy dis-pigmented skin on the bridge of his nose being familiar with the rider took the stolen bike and said "if this is your bike where is the key?". I argued with these shysters for about an hour as I tried to raise Jack on the phone. Finally an older dude with a slender mustache and smartly trimmed hair came out holding a hatchet non-threateningly and spoke discreetly with the dread-lock dude. They said "have your friend bring the key and $150 and we will give him his bike. Unfortunately I had to go tend to my business and as I rode to the city I shook hands with them and said cool. Contacting Jack finally as I rode up the bridge I told him where the shop was and hoped for the best. Looking back I feel like an ass for not having my chain on my bike. I would have locked the bike up to a nearby post and been able to unlock it when Jack got there later. Like they say, it is better to regret something you have done than something you have not done...

Jack's here and I will let him fill the next chapter in:

Well... Jack's a little busy to finish the story so I will do my best.

Jack went there and asked about his bike. The shysters played dumb and said that Gary Coleman/Webster doppelganger forced his way into their shop and took his bike. They said he came there to sell Jack's bike but they would not buy it. They were lying right to our faces in front of the cops who Jack brought over. I was there heckling but there was nothing to do.

I left the bike because I could not stay there for 3 hours waiting for Jack to arrive. I should have called the police and stayed there with the thieves while the police arrived. But shoulda woulda coulda. Now it is up to us to put an end to this BS. I will create a Google Doc with our beloved customers' bike serial numbers stored so that if their bikes are stolen we can file a report with the fuzz. Then one can go to Albany between Fulton and Herkimer and non-chelantly inquire about bikes they are selling. Slowly making your way to the class of bike that was stolen from you, find your bike and haggle a little with the shysters and then say "I gotta go to the bank to get the $$". Assuming you have already filed a police report, you can then return with the police and retrieve your bicycle.

We can put an end to this Hub of bicycle thievery if we are diligent and work together.

Bike Theft ALERT

One of our beloved customers had his bike gaffed. Let's keep eyes out for this. Here is his description.

Hi Guys, thanks for helping out on this one. Here's the description I posted all over the place.

Hi everyone, last night between 3:40 and 4:05AM my bike was stolen out of my building (470 Flushing Ave) by a tall black guy with a Yankees hat, black clothes and white shoes (like that really helps...). We got the whole thing on security camera but no clear shots of his face. He came from the direction of woodhull/marcy projects/​bushwick and left headed that way. Spent a half hour inside and apparently knew what he was looking for.

The bike is a Surly steamroller spraypainted matte black (maroon underneath) with stickers for kylesa, Trackstar, Atakke, and Parasytic on it. The paint is flaking all over. It has part of a white pentagram on the headtube.

It's got black sugino 75 cranks with white odyssey pedals (clip on only the left pedal), a 42t sugino ring, orange machined 28 spoke deep-v's to silver low flange phil hubs, silver riser bars with black oury grips, a black generic threadless stem and a turbo saddle on a silver kalloy post. The lock will still possibly be attached to it considering he ripped the entire bannister out of the wall and walked out with it still attached. The hubs are unique in that the phil logos don't line up with the valve stem holes.

According to a friend who saw the guy at around 6 before hearing it had been stolen, he's in the bed-stuy area still and is riding the bike. If you're at Pratt or by Fulton please keep extra close watch.

Please spread the word and call me at 917.873.4220 if you see anything like a steamroller with orange wheels/phil low flange hubs.

PLEASE REPOST THIS!

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Jack Drury
No Gods, No Vegetables
www.nogodsnovegetables.com
917.873.4220